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Lorraine Zencic's Auckland based training course equips would-be Santas to deal with hordes of children - the needy and the greedy and their pocket-wise parents in Auckland's shopping malls.
Santa in the 1990s has to chat computer software with under-fives. He must keep his hands in sight at all times when children are on his knee or risk accusations of impropriety. Alcohol and tobacco on the breath are no-no's as is flirting with shop assistants.
About 50 men are taking the course. Many are experienced Santas brushing up their skills, and they share stories from the trenches.
Jack Perkins interviews several unidentified men about their experiences as shopping mall Santas.
Lorraine Zencic is heard instructing would-be Santas on their job and expectations. She is interviewed about problems recruiting the right people to be Santa and the importance of Christmas shopping for retailers.
The programme ends with all the Santas wishing National Radio listeners a Merry Christmas.